Bella Vida

Married for 6 years. Trying to have a baby almost as long. Living a Beautiful Life.

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Location: Maryland, United States

Married & Trying to have a baby for almost 4 years. Dealing with MF (male factor infertility).

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Yep, another post about Charlotte

Ok. So hubbs* and I went to see Sex and the City over the weekend. As everyone knows from the previews (which pretty much tell the entire movie) Charlotte is pregnant.

--------SPOILERS AHEAD--------

In the film, after adopting a baby, Charlotte finds herself with a surprise pregnancy. She tosses out there that people told her once she relaxed and adopted--she would get pregnant. Ya know, like magic. When this scene played on the big screen, I actually laughed out load and said something along the lines of "yeah, right." Very loudly. In a silent theater. I should have stood up and yelled like Sunny. It was a really bothersome scene and it took a little while sitting there to get back to enjoying the film. In my head I tried to make excuses for the whole thing. I told myself that it was written by a man and that people who haven't experienced infertility (IF) just can't understand. Similar to what I tell myself when someone says those things to me. I find I have to rationalize it so I don't get too upset by it anymore.

Don't we all wish there was a magic solution or cure to IF. But here in the real world, real crappy stuff happens. Sometimes over and over to the same people. What's funny is that the IF storyline struck me so, and was very hard for me to believe. But the rest of it I was able to buy hook, line, and sinker. I bought into the fantasy that someone left standing at the alter would run back into the arms of the man that left her there. Perhaps someone else in a theater cried out at the scene where there finally was a wedding because she was left at the alter and thought "there is no way in hell."

I liked the movie a lot in spite of Charlotte and her magic pregnancy. I've accepted that there are things you can't understand until you've experience them. Perhaps that's just the way I keep myself from wishing evil upon others on a daily basis. Like my mother when she called to tell me that I needed to douche with salt water in order to get pregnant. Cuz, ya know, she was talking to a woman at a party who tried to get pregnant for 13 years and it worked for her 40 years ago. Never mind the sperm issue we have. Douching will fix allllll that. Anyway...

*Don't feel sorry for my husband for having to see this with me. We saw Indiana Jones first and then Sex. Besides, he actually liked it :)


Anonymous Anonymous said...

SO LAME!!! A quick statistic I learned in my Adoption class. 5% of all women who have infertility and don't adopt, get pregnant. 5% of all women who have infertility and adopt get pregnant. It's 6's either way. The statistic doesn't change. WE GOTTA LOVE HOLLYWOOD!!! :)

4:35 PM  
Blogger Still Standing Strong in A Bloom of Hope. said...

I haven't watched SATC yet cuz it just hit us in Australia on 5 June! But I have heard SO MUCH about what Charlotte said. I bet I'll probably go F$#@!K THAT!!

And I can't help but smile about what your mum said: douche with salt water and you'll get pregnant.
Just like what they tell me: Put your legs up in the air so that his sperm enters you better! Again, I'm rolling my eyes.

Thanks for dropping by my blog. :)

7:42 PM  
Blogger Deathstar said...

The miracle adoption pregnancy, pity it just happens to OTHER people.

11:19 PM  
Blogger Sunny said...

Oh I wish we could have watched together. HA! It would have been so much fun to yell out together!

10:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It was my least favorite part of the movie as well. I did laugh out loud, and did retort, "Um, yeah, like that actually works." The woman next to me wiggled, and I didn't quite care.

9:46 AM  
Anonymous Charlotte Fairchild said...

Well, how about Fertility Blend for guys and for you?

Before you get all upset, check out the Stanford University site on the research, and the blog articles on the phmiracleliving?

You are right about what the doctor telling Charlotte bogus stuff, but heck, doctors are telling women they have miscarriages because of genetic problems, and it is probably low grade infections they don't know how to treat! Check out yeast infections (know any women and yeast infections?) and horses on Google. 30K articles on that, but 2 on women who have infertility/sterility. No one loses money if a woman is unable to carry a baby to term. So why fix the problem easily? And docs won't mention Fertility Blend because of the money. They don't make any IMHO.

I wrote a book called Fertile Prayers. It might help, or it might be something you tell someone about. It is either about 70 bucks on Amazon or $4.95 on and it doesn't tell bogus stupid things like the movies do.

9:32 PM  
Blogger chicklet said...

I haven't seen this yet but I keep hearing about it and good gawd that pushes my buttons that she said that, cuz no TRUE infertile ever would say it. EVER.

9:41 PM  
Blogger dmarie said...

Thx for visiting. I'm very familiar with Fertility Blend. Have you used it successfully? Or your husband??

9:11 AM  
Anonymous Charlotte Fairchild said...

Thanks for the visit. Yes, Fertility Blend works for me and also for my husband. We haven't had a baby, but we are both near 50, and it could happen. I started ovulating at 43, and I have now lost 110 pounds. I started fertility treatment at 136 pounds. The focus is getting healthy, and then the pregnancy will happen naturally. Nothing in Fertility Blend can cause a miscarriage, and nothing will give you cancer in this supplement. It may not be as fast--but the odds are much better, and there won't be multiple births. 25% of women get hysterectomies in the US. I am health, not like when I went through 30 docs (7 RE, and 2 endocrinologists). They did not give me ovulation, pretty and painfree periods, and a beautiful body.

11:21 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I , silly girl that I am, decided to go see this movie the day before my retrieval, you know, to get my mind off of "things". I did not know to expect the magical pregnancy because it was the very day the movie came out and people weren't much talking about it yet.

I have to admit it annoyed me, especially since I was freaking out and nervous about my retrieval. I remember thinking, I WOULD go see a movie with a MAGICAL pregnancy on "retrieval eve", just my luck to stumble upon THAT one, huh? ;-)

4:14 PM  
Blogger Pamela Jeanne said...

Hmmm. Still on the face about whether I plan to see this movie -- and not just because of this story line.

p.s. don't know if you noticed but I was wearing my pomegranite bracelet in the photos shown on the NYT infertility voices long sleeve sweater unfortunately got in the way in most shots, but if you look closely you'll see it! ;-)

6:24 PM  
Anonymous Charlotte Fairchild said...

Subfertile and stats. Julia Indochinova might have used Fertility Blend had it been out.

I just use Vitex because I cannot afford Fertility Blend. Most women with infertility have been too angry. Or maybe there aren't that many spiritual people out there. All I know is that I am alive. After 11 years of my nightmare, I came out of it and got healthy. One woman went through hyperstimulation and the same surgery I had twice, but she died.

10:23 PM  
Blogger dmarie said...

I'm not sure what you meant by writing "Most women with infertility have been too angry." Fertility Blend works for some and doesn't work for others. Bottom line, if there was a "cure all miracle" out there working for everyone--we'd all be running out selling everything to get it.

12:16 AM  
Blogger Ms Heathen said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting. I'm glad it wasn't just me who was pissed off about this particular aspect of the film!

12:26 PM  

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